Jokes

(A Supposedly True Story) An elderly lady did her shopping and, upon return, found four males in her car. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at them at the top of her voice that… (READ MORE)

We always hear “the rules” from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our  rules! They’re ALL important and not in priority order. Learn to work the toilet seat.  You’re a grown woman.  If it’s up,… (READ MORE)

It was snowing heavily and blowing to the point that visibility was almost zero when the little blonde got off work. She made her way to her car and wondered how she was going to make it home. She sat… (READ MORE)

‘Twas the night before Christmas–Old Santa was pissed. He cussed out the elves and threw down his list. Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks. I have a good mind to scrap the whole works! I’ve busted my ass for damn… (READ MORE)

A bear walks into a bar in Billings, Montana and sits down. He bangs on the bar with his paw and demands a beer. The bartender approaches and says “we don’t serve beer to bears in bars in Billings.” The… (READ MORE)

Q: Why do men like smart women? A: Opposites attract. Q: How do men define a “50/50” relationship? A: We cook-they eat; we clean-they dirty; we iron-they wrinkle. Q: How do you get a man to stop biting his nails?… (READ MORE)

* This from a radio program, a true report of a happening in Michigan: A guy buys a brand new Jeep Grand Cherokee for $30,000 and has $400+ monthly payments. He and a friend go duck hunting and of course… (READ MORE)

I was taking a shower when my 2-year-old son came into the bathroom and wrapped himself in toilet paper. Although he made a mess, he looked adorable, so I ran for my camera and took a few shots. They came… (READ MORE)

A kindergarten class had a homework assignment to find out about something exciting and relate it to the class the next day. When the time came to present what they’d found, the first little boy called upon walked up to… (READ MORE)